31 weeks on Wednesday. So I’m in the 32nd week now.
It’s been snowing all day and I’m in a peaceful heaven. I could watch snow fall for hours; it’s just the prettiest darn weather. On snow days as a kid, I would lie down on the floor of my mom’s house with my head at the sliding glass window, so I could be warm and cozy inside but watch plump snowflakes come tumbling down over me. The gentleness and tempo soothes me. It’s a meditation.
60 days to go until my due date. When I look at in terms of days, it’s not very far away. And my days seem to go so quickly—consumed by research, reading, education, thinking about baby, rubbing my belly, walking, yoga, eating, household chores, watching “Midwives” and “One Every Minute” on YouTube, journalling, and some art projects. Despite feeling rather crappy most of the time, I’m so appreciating that I am off work now. I needed some rest time desperately.
The past week has been difficult. I’ve been very tired and fatigued. Breathless. I think my low iron is starting to show its effects. Trying to get the iron from my diet but I think I may need to add a supplement to boost the stores. Baby is taking all of it and likely depleting me even more. I’m dead tired sometimes. Walking up the stairs can obliterate all of my energy. Ah so *this* is what it’s like to be pregnant! Finally I have a common symptom…
Every week I quickly check the pregnancy websites for updates on how baby is growing, and they all have a section on “common symptoms” during this time, like pregnancy is some kind of disease. And it’s always the negative: headaches, difficulty sleeping, varicose veins, stretch marks, baby brain, etc. What about the good things? Like the connecting and bonding time, the reactive movements, the growing anticipation, your beautiful round belly to show off, all the wonderful attention you receive from strangers, the fun of coming up with baby names with your partner, SHOPPING. Sure of course there are the unfavourable and likely unwelcome symptoms, but these websites don’t look at all the good things too.
I’ve been taking Brené Brown’s e-course “The Gifts of Imperfection” for the past six weeks and the journal I’m working on is magnificent! So this week I started a little gratitude journal and have been writing down five things I am grateful for each day. That is where I am storing all those “good things” that are happening during this incredible time. The best part lately has been the playing. He kicks, I push back, he replies with more movement. And I’ve been singing to him a lot more, and he often responds. Very cool.
I finally got a decent video of baby’s movement in my tummy. Watch closely—I tried not to breath with my belly—that’s all baby moving. It’s becoming less like little kicks and more like elbows and knees and feet and hands stretching out and across my belly. It’s a rolling, not a kick or bump. It’s just so awesome. I know, I say that every time I post an update, but I just can’t get over how amazing it feels.
Next week: the birth plan.